Sometimes you feel like a hoarder, sometimes you don't

I am an anti-hoarding advocate. I've never understood the emotional attachment to stuff.

Maybe because for a good part of my childhood grew up in a house where throwing away old junk was frowned upon. Not that anyone was a hoarder, but some people have unnatural attachments to old furniture.

Just because your grandma once owned a table doesn't mean that you should keep it till you die. I'm sure that when she bought that table 50 years ago she didn't intend for it to be sitting in someone's storage room because no one can bear to part with it.

I have no sentimental attachment to any of my furniture. The only thing I've owned longer than five years is the hope chest I got for 8th grade graduation. Everything else was bought since Alana was born. I know, I'm still paying for some of it.

I get rid of my clothes if they don't fit anymore. I don't save stuff in the hopes that it will fit me again someday. I do save maternity clothes, but that's because I'm cheap. Those things are expensive. I don't even have any of my prom or bridesmaid dresses anymore. I'm never gonna wear them again, what's the point?

I can't hardly even watch shows about hoarding. I want to throw up. I don't understand the compulsion to keep everything. Pizza boxes, old wine bottles, receipts, all of your old clothes, smelly old furniture. Throw it away. Get some new crap already.

But when it comes to baby clothes I'm a different person.

With Alana I kept everything. Blankets, clothes, bedding, shoes. I rationalized that if my next baby was a girl then I would already have most of the stuff I needed. When she was about 18 months I got rid of all of the blankets. Couldn't justify keeping those anymore. But I kept the clothes.

When I got pregnant with Ava, I went through these boxes of old clothes. Something funny had happened. I didn't really like them that much anymore. Sure, there were some things that I picked up and remembered how cute and small Alana once was. But for the most part, I wrinkled my nose and wondered what was I thinking.

After we found out that we were having a girl, David said Good, now we don't have to buy anything. But I was thinking more like Crap, now she will have to wear clothes that I don't really like that much. And I'm not exactly made of money these days, so how will I buy new ones.

I ended up getting rid of all of Alana's newborn clothes, except pajamas. Pajamas can be expensive, and who really cares if I thought they weren't as cute? She only wears them to sleep in anyway.

After Ava grew some and didn't wear these newborn clothes anymore, I didn't automatically get rid of them. I put them in a rubbermaid container in the storage room, just like I did with Alana's clothes. Then I got out Alana's old clothes for Ava to wear (the ones that made it through the first round of give-aways). I tried to put them on Ava, but they just didn't suit her personality. She is a bright, colorful spirit. The clothes were all blah. So Ava's wardrobe was reduced to mostly things that she was the original owner of.

This morning I decided to finish sorting through our baby clothes. Two of David's co-workers are having girls, which is a perfect way to get rid of some of the clothes piling up over here.

Alana's old clothes don't really tug at my heartstrings as much these days. She's not a baby anymore, she's 3 1/2. Her baby clothes are mostly gone, and her clothes now get stained before she outgrows them. The only thing I save of hers anymore is jeans and pajamas. No matter how picky I am, those two things don't matter to me that much. Pajamas are only worn at night, and jeans are pretty generic.

Then I got to Ava's clothes. My chest felt tight and my eyes started watering. They're so small! It wasn't even that long ago that she wore them! I just bought this shirt, and its not too small quite yet, but its long sleeves, so it too hot to wear. I can't get rid of this, I remember when she wore it! I love this dress!

Its especially hard for me to get rid of newborn clothes. They are so little and cute, and they remind me of the days when you first bring your baby home from the hospital. They are so tiny and fragile, and despite the stitches in your crotch that you have because of them, you are head over heels in love with them.

You spend your time just staring at them in awe of how special and perfect they are. To me, those memories include the tiny little onesies they wear for that first part of their life. When the label says up to 8 lbs, and its still too big for them. When they are swimming in their tiny pajamas. You can't even find their little feet in the bunch of fabric.

My favorite part of having a new baby is just looking at them. They will sleep through anything and everything so that makes them perfect for snuggling.

The first time I held Ava I immediately decided that I wanted to have a third baby. You forget how small they start out. By the time they are two they're so big and grown-up, its nice to have a little angel to hug while your two year old screams they want to watch Spongebob.

The logical part of me knows that my next baby could be a boy. But I'd love another girl. Either way, I'm gonna want and need to get some new clothes. That's why I packed up most of Ava's baby clothes to give away.

Now I'd better go, cause thinking about it makes me sad. There's still time to take the clothes out of the giveaway box!

I'll leave you with a picture of my babies.

Alana at one day old. (Above).

Me and Ava. She is looking at me like I'm crazy.

***Quick tip: If you are having a baby and want to look good in the pictures, do your hair and make-up. Otherwise you'll look back at yourself and think Yuck. That's why I didn't show you a picture of me with Alana, I look crappy.